What a Bloody Mess
by
R. Brian Campbell
“Garth the Adventurer?”
I looked up from the dagger I was honing. “Yes, I am. How can I help you?”
The well dressed, royal looking man on the other side of my desk looked at me nervously, obviously assessing whether or not I was capable of solving his problem. “Well…Uh…”
Time to look the part of a professional. I slid my feet off my desk, set down the dagger and honing stone, and rose to my feet. “Good sir, if you don’t tell me what your problem is, there is no way that I can help you.”
“Uh, yes. Indeed.” He straightened up, making a decision. “I am Duke Osgood, of the Everbright Duchy, in the Butternut Kingdom. My Daughter, the Lady Caroline, has been abducted. I heard of your exploits from King Thaddeus. Apparently, you rescued his daughter-”
“Princess Rose. Yes, I remember her.”
“Princess Rosalinda,” the Duke corrected, as if I cared.
“Indeed,” I responded. “Yes, that was my first run-in with the dragon Gem and Ni. I remember it well. Your daughter wasn’t kidnapped by a dragon, was she?”
“No. Not a dragon. Caroline was abducted by vampires.”
“Vampires?” I paused a moment, trying to find the right words. But sometimes there was simply no nice way to say something. “Uh, I don’t know how to tell you this. My Lord, but-”
The Duke raised his hands, stopping me from continuing. “I know what you are going to say, but that isn’t the case. It’s… I’d probably better explain from the beginning.”
“That would be best,” I agreed, nodding.
He took a deep breath. “Caroline was travelling to the Moonglow Kingdom for a Royal Wedding. She had been asked to attend the bride. Two dozen guards accompanied the party, which included five carriages, filled with attendants, handmaidens and several other Royal guests. They left at first light, but the trip was a long one, and the procession moved slowly, so the sun was setting before they were within the safety of the Moonglow Kingdom’s walls.
”A large group of vampires dropped from the sky on the procession. The guards fought valiantly, but they were not equipped to fight vampires and they were all slaughtered. As were the other members of the party.
“One of my daughter’s handmaidens was knocked to the ground by a falling guard and must have been left for dead, because they overlooked her. She was too petrified to make a sound and, being covered with the guard’s blood, must have looked dead. When she was found, after a chirurgeon had given her something to calm her, she told us that she had heard the vampires talking among themselves. She heard their leader say that they needed to take my daughter to Spectre Rock, on the other side of the Black Forest, as a ritual sacrifice to their Goddess. The handmaiden said she heard the vampire leader warn the others that Caroline must remain undamaged for their goddess to accept her as a sacrifice.”
I nodded again. “So that is how you know that your daughter is still alive. When is the ritual supposed to take place?”
“When the moon is at its fullest, and when it reaches its highest point in the night sky.” The Duke gripped the edge of my desk and leaned forward, his eyes pleading. “Garth. That is tomorrow night. Tomorrow night my daughter dies, unless you help her.”
I returned his gaze, confidently. “My Lord, I promise you that I will get your daughter back. It will cost you 200 gold pieces, plus expenses. And understand that expenses could very well be as high, or higher, than my fee. Battling vampires requires specialized equipment, and that doesn’t come cheap.”
“I understand, Garth,” he responded, gripping my hand. “Whatever it takes. Just get my daughter back.” He removed a very large money pouch from within his robes, opened it, and counted out 300 gold coins. “Take this, to start with. And let me know if you need more. Just get her back.”
I put my hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry, My Lord. I’ll get her back. Count on it.
“Thank you, Garth. You are exactly the man King Thaddeus said you were.” The Duke stepped back, composed himself, then turned and beat a hasty, but dignified retreat.
When the Duke had left, my assistant, Bart, poked his head around the door leading to the stable. “We have a new job?”
I turned to him with a smile. “Indeed we do. A tough one, at that. Rescuing a Duke’s daughter from vampires and, potentially, the Goddess they worship.”
“What kind of Goddess would vampires worship?” Bart asked.
I shook my head. “I’m not sure, but I think I can safely say that she won’t be pleasant. In fact, I’d guess that she will turn out to be extremely nasty.”
“Does this mean you are going to want me to stay behind?”
“Hades, no!” I responded. “I’m going to need all the help I can get. Now let’s get over to the armoury. Let’s see what equipment we have already, and figure out what we are going to need.”
“Yes, Sir!”
I crossed to the armoury, Bart keeping pace with me. I unlocked the door and we entered.
“What will we need?” Bart asked.
I looked over the weapons along the wall. “Vampires are fast, and they cannot be killed by normal weapons, like steel swords and axes. Elven silver will kill them. As will a wooden shaft through the heart. Since we will likely be taking on an entire coven of them, killing them from a distance is our best chance, at least until we have no choice but to fight close-up.”
“So, crossbows?” Bart suggested.
“Uh, uh,” I disagreed. “Too slow. Short bows are our best bet.” I removed one from the rack where it stood and strung it with a practiced motion. I pulled the string back, testing its flex. “Have you been practicing?”
“Yes, Sir.” Bart removed an identical bow and quickly strung it, to prove that he could.
“Good. We will need iron-oak shafts and Elven silver broadheads. As many as we can get into two quivers.” I counted out fifty gold pieces and set them on a work bench. “What we don’t have here, I need you to get from Max, the armourer. Got it?”
“Got it, Sir.”
I continued to check our supplies. “Okay, we both have Elven silver short swords, and I have no doubt that we will need them.” Bart removed the swords from their hooks and set them on the bench, as I listed our needs. “We also both have Elven silver-mail hauberks, but, for this mission we will need better protection. We need silver-mail gorgets, to protect our necks and throats. Add that to the items you’ll need to ask Max about. Tell him that I’ll pay anything extra that he needs.”
“Yes, Sir.” Bart already had a quill and ink bottle out, and was making notes on a parchment. I smiled. His letters were getting better. Who says that a former soldier can only teach a boy fighting skills?
I tapped my forefinger against my chin. Now, what else? Oh yeah. “For this mission, we’ll need the invisibility cloaks. Good thing I had a second one made for you. Set them aside.”
Yes, Sir.” Bart went to the shelf where the cloaks were neatly folded and added them to the ever growing pile of equipment. “Sir? What about the silver throwing knives and the slings with the silver projectiles?”
“Good idea, Bart,” I agreed. “Add them. But I think we’ll need something more.” I began making my own notes. “For that I need to talk to Amanwych.” I caught the nervous look from Bart. He clearly was not comfortable around our local sorcerer. Then again, neither was I. “Don’t worry, Bart, I’ll deal with Amanwych myself. You take care of getting what we need from Max. And remember, if that isn’t enough gold, he should bill me for the remainder.”
“Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir.”
“Okay. Let’s get to it.” We left the armoury, each heading towards our particular destination.
————————————————
While Bart went to see the armourer, I strode over to Amanwych’s temple. As I entered the darkened interior, lit only by the odd candle placed, seemingly, at random throughout the interior, I watched for, and saw, a dark shape separate from the shadows and glide towards me.
“Garth the Adventurer,” A deep, powerful voice boomed. The voice was at odds with the lean, almost skeletal frame from which it emerged. Amanwych’s glowing red eyes glared at me over his beaklike nose. “What brings you to my humble abode this day?”
“I wish to purchase your services.”
“Ahh, a paying customer.” Amanwych rubbed his bony hands together in a hand-washing motion. “What services do you require?”
“Merely a couple of spells,” I assured him.
It suddenly felt as if the temperature in the temple had dropped several degrees. Amanwych’s glare turned icy. Frost curled from his mouth as he responded. “There is nothing ‘Mere’ about any of my spells.”
I held up my hands in the universal symbol of surrender. “I meant no disrespect, Amanwych. I was simply attempting to say that what I require would be no great challenge to one of your abundant skill and talent.”
The temperature returned to a comfortable level. Amanwych smiled. “That is different. Now, tell me, what is it that I can provide for you?”
I deliberately concentrated on getting my breathing back to normal. Sorcerers were sure touchy. “My latest client needs me to rescue his daughter from a coven of vampires.”
Amanwych snorted. “Hmmph! Did you tell your client that his daughter is already dead?”
“That was my first thought too,” I agreed. “But a witness claimed that she was captured as a sacrifice to their Goddess. By the way, would you know what Goddess vampires worship?”
Amanwych tapped a claw of a fingernail against his chin, thoughtfully. “That would be Ker, Goddess of violent death, daughter of Nyx, Goddess of night, and sister to Moros, God of doom. She is a bloodthirsty one.”
“Wait a minute,” I interjected. “Aren’t there several Ker sisters?”
“Indeed,” He agreed. “One watches over battlefields, another is present at murders, and yet another attends those who die of ravaging disease. Apparently, the vampires have adopted one of the sisters as their deity. You must admit that she is quite suited for the worship of vampires. And you plan to face her? Then this will likely be the last time I see you.”
I looked closely at him, because, at first, I thought he was choking. But it turned out that he was laughing. It sounded like a cat hawking up a hairball. He didn’t strike me as someone with much of a sense of humour and probably didn’t have much practice laughing. I wasn’t thrilled about being the source of his current amusement. I swallowed once, hard. “You sure know how to inspire a guy. Well, since this may be the last time you see me, how about a discount?”
He grinned, revealing sharp, crooked teeth. “Since this may be the last time I see you, I should charge you extra. But first, what is it you seek?”
“To start with, I need a spell to silence footsteps, not for a horse this time, but for two humans. I also need to hide the scent of our blood.”
Amanwych nodded. “Sensible, and not too difficult to perform. I can create a combination spell that distracts those around you from noticing you. It will work for two humans, but if cast shortly after moonrise, it is not likely to last until the moon’s midpoint.”
“That would be fine. If we haven’t rescued Lady Caroline by then, it will be too late. Besides, I doubt that we will stay unnoticed that long anyway.”
“Indeed,” Amanwych agreed. “That spell will cost you 40 gold. Is there anything else you will be needing?”
“Yes. As a matter of fact, there is.” I took the parchment out of my belt, unrolled it, and spread it out on the table, in front of him. “Would it be possible for you to create this? Four of them, to be precise.”
Amanwych looked at the diagram I had created and studied the ingredient list along the side of the parchment. Then he looked up at me. “You came up with this?”
I nodded, smiling. “Yes, I did.”
“When did you study alchemy?”
I shrugged. “I didn’t. But I’ve been paying attention when in the presence of yourself and other mages. I picked up a few things. Not enough to try it myself, mind you, but enough to have a bit of an idea how you do some of it. A little. So, do you think it would work?”
He tapped a bony finger on his chin as he studied the parchment. “It just might. It just might, indeed.” He looked me in the eye. “You have potential, Garth the Adventurer.”
Once again, my hands came up in surrender. “Uh uh. You do the magic, I’ll stick to adventuring. Does this mean you can create them?”
It is possible that Amanwych’s smile was intended to be comforting. It wasn’t. “Indeed I can. And, in honour of your creativity, I will only charge you an additional 60 gold pieces.”
“Thank you. Do you think it would work on Ker?”
“Hard to say. But I do believe that your chances of survival have increased, somewhat.”
That was comforting. Maybe. I hope. Now for the tough question. “Would it be possible to have everything ready for tomorrow morning?”
“Most certainly,” Amanwych responded, with another chilling smile.
I counted 100 gold pieces onto the table, then turned to leave. “Thank you, Amanwych. See you at first light.”
“Until then, Garth the Adventurer.” Amanwych was already disappearing into the shadows, my gold with him.
—————————————————-
Bart and I were up early, gathered our supplies, and were en route to Spectre Rock. We circled around the Black Forest. One did not go through the forest without the witch, Abigail’s, permission, and she never gave her permission. Not without a price, anyway. Besides, Abigail and I weren’t on speaking terms, at present. I always believed in limiting your battles.
The sun was just beginning to set as we approached Spectre Rock. I stopped and gazed at the imposing monolith, jutting into the sky. It earned its name, looking far too much like a headstone for a giant, and wreathed in mist, disrupting light from reaching it, even on the brightest days. It was obvious why the vampires were drawn to it.
I dismounted. “From here, we walk. The horses would only attract the vampires, and we need them to get home.”
Bart dismounted without comment. We ground hitched our horses and began unloading our weapons and supplies. Bart laid everything out in two piles, as I prepared the items I had received from Amanwych.
“Are you ready?” I asked.
“Yes, Sir,” He responded. “Ready when you are.”
“Good.” I opened the first pouch, poured half of the fine, sticky, sand-like substance into my palm, then handed the pouch to Bart. “Rub your body with this, especially any exposed skin, but try to cover as much of your body as possible, especially the soles of your moccasins, the palms and backs of your hands, and your neck.”
I rubbed myself down with Amanwych’s distraction spell, as Bart did the same. Once we were covered with the substance, we each gathered our weapons and equipment, belting and distributing them in secure, yet easily accessible places about our bodies. I picked up the two pouches containing the special items Amanwych created for me, handed one to Bart, and hung the second one from my belt. Finally, we donned our invisibility cloaks. Technically, the cloaks didn’t make us invisible, so much as it caused observers to overlook us. Someone who knew what they were looking for, could see something out of place, but couldn’t tell what it was. Hopefully, the vampires didn’t know to watch for parts of the landscape blurring and shifting.
“From here on it, we maintain total silence,” I advised Brat. “Use the tap code I taught you, on each other’s cloaks.”
Bart nodded his understanding, and tapped, YES, on the shoulder of my cloak.
I smiled and led the way towards Spectre Rock. The sun set well before we reached its base, leaving our way lit only by the full moon and stars overhead, both of which were obscured by the mist surrounding the huge rock. Actually, close up, Spectre Rock turned out to be one large rock, surrounded by smaller rocks of varying sizes. There was a cave opening midway up, and we began climbing towards it.
I saw the guards and tapped Bart’s cloak, signaling for him to stop. He tapped back that he saw them too. They were lesser vampires, hairless and wearing rags, with large, pointed ears, protruding fangs, large, bat-like wings, and grey skin, looking more like gargoyles than vampires. We strung our bows and removed silver tipped arrows, the arrowheads smeared with lampblack, to prevent their shine from giving us away. I tapped a slow three count on Bart’s shoulder, then counted slowly in my head, as I raised my bow and aimed. Our arrows launched almost simultaneously, streaking towards their targets. Both hit the vampires square in their chests, and they dropped to the rocks below. We approached them cautiously. They appeared to be dead, but we used our silver swords to cut their throats, just in case. Then we moved on.
We dispatched two more lesser vampires just inside the cave opening. The cave entrance opened into a huge cavern, empty, except for us and the two vampire corpses. The cavern branched off into two tunnels, one leading left, one leading right. I motioned for Bart to take the right, while I took the left. I tapped the signal for caution, and he responded with the signal for, of course. I watched him until he disappeared from view, then turned down my tunnel.
The tunnel was large enough to walk comfortably, but not much larger. If I met anyone, I’d better get them before they sensed me, because there would be no way to bypass them. Fortunately, the vampires appeared to be satisfied with the sentries they left, and I met no one in the tunnel. It appeared to encircle the interior of Spectre Rock, gradually climbing towards the top. It was black as pitch and I had to force myself not to light a torch or candle. Finally, it began to get lighter, as I reached the top. Moonlight was shining through the exit to the apex of Spectre Rock. Unfortunately, there was a guard standing in front of my only way out.
Unfortunate for the guard, that is, because it was facing away from me, looking at whatever was going on out there. It was another lesser vampire, and it was oblivious to my presence, as I slipped up behind it, silver dagger in my hand. I wrapped my free arm around its neck and drove the dagger into its back, piercing its heart. Unlike the previous guards, this one released a high-pitched wail, alerting anyone and everyone in the immediate, and possibly distant, area of my presence. So much for secrecy.
I burst out of the tunnel shoving the dying vampire ahead of me. I pushed my hood back and let my cloak open up in front, giving me better access to my weapons. Without thinking about it, I had my bow in one hand, nocking an arrow with the other. A vampire was swooping down on me from somewhere overhead, and I smoothly shot it out of the sky. Another was running at me, and I brought that one down next. Vampires were coming at me from all sides, and I was killing them as fast as they appeared, but I wasn’t sure how much longer I could keep it up.
“HALT!” A voice roared, causing the vampires to cease attacking and pull back. The crowd of lesser vampires parted, revealing a quartet of greater vampires gliding towards me. Greater vampires were much more human looking, with long, flowing hair, and more human looking features. More human looking, if you could overlook their emaciated, almost skeletal appearance, parchment pale skin, slightly pointed ears, glowing red eyes, sharp, protruding fangs and, of course, large, bat-like wings extending from between their shoulder blades. The group confronting me appeared to be a pair of males and a pair of females, although they dressed similarly, in long, black, death shrouds, with cutouts for arms and wings, and belted around their waists. All appeared to be barefoot, which made sense, since their ‘feet’ were rounded, ending in fingerlike claws, similar to a bat’s. They stopped in front of me, one of the males stepping forward.
“Why have you defiled our home?” The creature snarled.
“You have disrupted our sacred ceremony,” One of the females added.
“As a matter of fact,” I responded. “I am here for your ceremony.”
“You?” The male retorted, surprised. “A human? Here for our ceremony?”
“Out of the question,” The female asserted. Even though the male had stepped forward and spoke first, it was becoming obvious to me who was really in charge.
“But I am,” I insisted. “I have business with your guest of honour.”
“Our guest of-” The male turned and all the vampires parted, revealing for the first time, the Lady Caroline, lying on her back, tied to flat rock in the very centre of the top of Spectre Rock. She appeared to be awake, but not entirely alert. Possibly drugged or mesmerized. “Her?”
“Yes, her,” I agreed, nocking an arrow while they were distracted. “Actually, I’ll have to take her from you. You see, her father wants her back and would be rather displeased if she continued to participate in your ritual. So if you will kindly stand aside-”
“ENOUGH!” The head female vampire roared. “KILL HIM!”
I felt more than heard movement behind me, and turned just in time to see a lesser vampire, who had been sneaking up behind me, sprout an arrowhead, which thrust out through the centre of its chest. A second vampire similarly grew an arrow in its chest. That was when I saw Bart, stepping from a second cave, while nocking another arrow.
I turned, raising my bow. The head male was nearly atop me. My arrow struck him at close range, tearing through his chest. I already had a second arrow up and was tracking the head female, when the other female vampire leapt on me. I dropped my bow and drew a dagger, even as I crashed to the ground. The female vampire was clawing at my throat, but, so far, the Elven neck guard was protecting me. How long it would last, I didn’t know, and I wasn’t willing to wait and find out. Using my free arm, I forced some space between us and drove my dagger between her breasts. She screamed and arched backwards, her wings beating, lifting her off me. I scrambled to my feet, drawing my silver sword and, with a two-handed swing severed her head. Then I looked around for the head female.
The greater vampires had faded into the background, but there was a large supply of lesser vampires between me and the Lady Caroline. Bart stepped up beside me, slinging his bow and drawing his sword. I picked up my bow and slung it over my shoulder. Then, holding my sword in one hand and my dagger in the other, I charged the lesser vampires, Bart at my side.
The ferocity of our attack, combined with our use of Elven silver weapons, caused the vampires to draw back, in spite of their greater numbers and strength. A short bloody battle later, and we were beside the stone where the Lady Caroline was tied.
“Bart,” I yelled. “Cut Caroline free, while I hold them off.”
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY SACRIFICE?” A voice like the booming of thunder pounded down on us, combined with the rush of a powerful wind.
I looked up and saw a huge, almost harpy-like, creature, hovering over us, wearing a flowing, blood-red, tattered gown. It had huge bat-like wings, an elongated face, filled with long, triangular teeth, and needle-sharp claws on both hands and feet. She was glaring at us with blazing red eyes. Ker!
“EITHER BE GONE FROM MY SACRIFICE OR BECOME MY SACRIFICE. THE DECISION IS YOURS.”
I wasn’t a fan of either of those options. I nodded to Bart and we both reached into our belts, removing our slings and the special items that Amanwych had created for us. As one we launched them at Ker, loading the second pair the moment we released the first ones.
“WHAT? ARE YOU ACTUALLY ATTEMPTING TO FIGHT ME? BY THROWING PEBBLES? I’LL SHOW YOU WHAT I THINK OF YOUR PUNY WEAPONS.” Ker snatched the first projectile out of the air. It exploded in her claws, while the second one struck her side. A silver glow enveloped her. Bart and I launched our remaining two shots.
“WHAT IS THIS?” Ker screamed as the next two objects hit her and more silver spray encased her and glittered in the air around her, brightening the night sky. She floundered, weaving wildly in the sky, as the silver coated her wings. She was struggling to stay aloft. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?”
I looked around, and all the vampires were frozen in place, staring at their Goddess, struggling from a weapon used by mere humans. Some were backing or flying away, as silver dust floated to the ground. None were paying the slightest attention to us.
“Bart. Time to go.” I hissed, as I cut Lady Caroline free. She was obviously in no condition to move under her own power, so I threw her, unceremoniously, over one shoulder and ran for the tunnel out, Bart right behind me.
By the time we reached the horses, Lady Caroline was beginning to come out of whatever they used to keep her compliant. At least, she was in good enough shape to ride the spare horse we had brought along. Soon, we were on our way.
“It worked, Sir,” Bart exclaimed, happily.
“Indeed it did, Bart,” I agreed. “I wasn’t sure if Amanwych could help with this, but I was hoping he could.”
Proud of my success in creating a semi-magical item, I continued my explanation as we rode as quickly as we could, with our dazed and shaky princess, away from Spectre Rock. “You see, since silver repels magic, you can’t actually encase it in a magic bubble. So what was needed was the use of alchemy, which isn’t actually magic. Well, not exactly. What I designed, and Amanwych created, was silver dust, mixed with tree sap to make it sticky, suspended in a blown glass bubble, strong enough not to break apart early, but under pressure, so when it did break, the silver would explode everywhere. I asked Amanwych what he thought, and he believed that the weapon had a chance against Ker. That was good enough for me. The simple fact was, it was all we had, and the way I looked at it, a slight chance was better than no chance at all. As it turned out, it worked even better than I had dared hope. Chasing away the vampires was an added bonus.”
“Do you think it killed her?”
I shook my head. “The only thing that ever seriously harms a God is lack of worshipers. All that we did was slow her down. We also, very likely, made her extremely angry, so we’d better be careful to stay out of her way for a very, very long time.”
“Good idea, Sir.”
We spent the rest of our journey filling Lady Caroline in on what she had missed.
———————————————-
“Thank you very much for rescuing my daughter, Garth. You too, Bart,” Duke Osgood gushed. “I owe you much. If ever you need my assistance, do not hesitate to ask. Speaking of owing you,” He reached into a pocket and removed a large pouch of clinking coins. “Here is an additional two hundred gold pieces.”
“Actually, My Lord,” I attempted. “Our expenses weren’t-”
The Duke waved away my rejection. “Nonsense. You earned every coin, and my undying gratitude. Now, not another word about it.”
“Yes, Sir, my Lord. Thank you Sir,” I responded, as the Duke returned to his carriage.
Bart and I looked at each other and smiled. You know, I thought, maybe these royals weren’t all that bad, after all.